I'm that lawyer with that post about crying and I'm just trying to cope with the fact that I'm no longer allowed to write critical papers about gossip girl or disney movies for women's studies courses.
Just realized that Liev Schrieber played the scientist who bring Hugh Jackman into the present in Kate and Leopold and also is wolverines little brother in all the movies and also apparently they have the same director so now I’m incorporating kate and leopold into the Wolverine canon as an AU prequel
Five below sells silicone reusable straws and they’re sturdy and chewy and I’m just so si happy I can finally use a cute tumbler without having to deal with a hard metal straw and it’s like wowewwww tell me you’re neurodivergent without telling me you’re neurodivergent
Excuse you but seeing an empty hallway and letting my fiancé sprint and rocket us down the length of it is better than any roller coaster
Or the time I was rolling down an aisle at the grocery store, seen a pack of toilet paper blocking me, and my fiancé raced ahead of me and threw it back up on its respective shelf while yelling “YEET” at the top of their lungs
The occasional time when a friend says “do you want to walk down to (place)” or any phrasing that implies the use of legs/feet and I get to put a hand on my heart and say “rude!” and act dramatically offended while they flail and bop me on the head for teasing them is the height of comedy
If you’re like me and have someone to help push your chair sometimes? You can travel AND play Pokémon at the same time without bumping in to people
That time a kid, no more than five, saw me using my wheelchair and came over (very politely I might add, and mom was trying to apologize and teach them not to run up to me) to ask me how it worked and why I needed it. I did manage to explain that asking why wasn’t very nice, but showed her how it worked and let them ride in my lap for a minute. That was adorable and fun, especially cause the kid was just so polite and asking before touching anything, repeatedly checking in that it was an okay question to ask, you could really tell she was doing her best 😍
Similarly, the little boy sitting in the shopping cart who saw me drive past in the store’s scooter and very softly whispered transformer. I put a finger to my lips and said “I’m in disguise” and his whole face lit up
The look on the faces of everyone in the queue for security, passport control, and to get on the plane when I’m rolled past like the queen of England before they can go.
This morning my husband and his best friend and I all went to ikea to get better craft storage to make room for the baby’s things. And the boys helped me explore options and found something that was modular and worked for me and helped me pick out my exact colors and configuration. And also waited for me to pick out some snacks for myself in the car. And then they fit it all in the car and we drove back, dropped stuff off, and grabbed lunch at an amazing ramen spot, and then gelato.
And now they’re listening to their favorite DND podcast together, breaking down my old craft storage space and building the new one, with fancy power tools. And have told me to go nap in a room with a big fan in it.
This is just….this is actually what people should mean when we say “boys will be boys.”
don’t know what parent of an autistic child needs to hear this but as long as they’re not harming anyone your kid’s stimming is not a “problem behaviour”
in our house we have a few categories of stimming behavior.
1. the no category. this is for things that are unsafe. hurting self (head banging, scratching), hurting others, chewing on choking hazards. i know this is excluded in OP’s post, but i’m putting it on my list because if you parent an autistic child and deal with this, you have to be aware that a key to off-limits stimming is redirection. stimming satisfies an important physical and neurological need for the autistic brain, and that behavior is sensory-seeking. if you must say no, please also offer options or help redirecting to appropriate outlets for pressure, motion, rhythm, chewing, etc.
2. the shared space category. listen, i get that a lot of people are assholes about things that aren’t hurting them. that’s not what this category is for. but we have a household with multiple autistic individuals and a work from home situation. “shared space” is the code phrase we use for “please take this stimming to a different location.” sometimes, aural stims like repetitive noises or physical stims like pacing can be legitimately distracting to other people in a room (or car!). in the case of other autistic people, it might even feel painful or mentally consuming. this category is no-judgment “please move to another location to continue stimming this way.” it’s not bad, it’s not wrong, you aren’t being shamed– just do your best to respect others and their needs or comfort, and leave the communal area or lower your volume.
3. the you do you category. it doesn’t matter that nobody else is doing this to feel comfortable or happy– you aren’t hurting anyone else, you aren’t being disruptive in a space other people are using together. go for it.
and in every single category, anger has no place in redirecting a stim. not even the no category. stimming isn’t malicious, there’s no actual moral requirement to be “less weird” or “like everyone else.” even reminders like “you aren’t the only person in this room and that’s very loud” don’t need anger. stims aren’t done at anyone. they’re just the body expressing a kind of neurological hunger, and whether the answer is “enjoy that!” or “this isn’t safe for you to eat (ie, do)” fury doesn’t help.
oh shit this is a REALLY helpful way to conceptualize stimming and competing needs.
Ugh I have such feels about the juror no 6 episode of leverage
Like wtf brown face? But also, brown face to pointedly con a disingenuous white liberal who of course is begging to be duped like this ?
Also the whole buying off a lawyer and Hardison just swooping in thing? Wildly illogical and illegal and would not have happened like…there are so many reasons why I would think sanctions and contacting the attorney would have happened before Hardison would have arrived?
Introducing evidence mid trial? Summarily would have been denied.
Jury foreman caught stealing? Actually a mistrial.
If you in theory wanted to verify the death of someone in another state and hopefully its cause as well, how would you go about it if you had only that person’s first name and the name of their self-owned business?
Could you do that without help and how, or would you need to hire a PI, and if you did hire somone, could it be in your state or would you need to do it in the other state?
I have a model railroading vampire realtor I need to unmask.
Hi! I’m a former public defender and current family law attorney, also polyamorous woman (background checks are part of my standard safety practice for dating) and this is how I would do it!
I would first Google around to see if I could find the website of the business, which generally would have contact info and a full name, as well as a good address. It’s also easy to look up certificate of status for any type of small business that’s properly filed for incorporation (and it’s pretty much necessary if it’s their sole source of income).
I would then take the information I get from the Google search (if the Google search didn’t turn up an obituary, of course) and incorporation certificate and run a background check, through the court system (most states have some sort of public state court/case search), VineLink (a prison database!) and using a private pay but legit service like intellius. Alternatively, if I’m looking to verify just the death—not the circumstances etc—I would go to vitalChek, and request a death certificate with the persons full name and DOB, using all the info I’ve gathered from the above searches.
Hope that helps!
Side note: if they’re a realtor (Idk about the model railroad bit??) they would def have to have some sort of public certification/license which would also give you vital info.
If you in theory wanted to verify the death of someone in another state and hopefully its cause as well, how would you go about it if you had only that person’s first name and the name of their self-owned business?
Could you do that without help and how, or would you need to hire a PI, and if you did hire somone, could it be in your state or would you need to do it in the other state?
I have a model railroading vampire realtor I need to unmask.
Hi! I’m a former public defender and current family law attorney, also polyamorous woman (background checks are part of my standard safety practice for dating) and this is how I would do it!
I would first Google around to see if I could find the website of the business, which generally would have contact info and a full name, as well as a good address. It’s also easy to look up certificate of status for any type of small business that’s properly filed for incorporation (and it’s pretty much necessary if it’s their sole source of income).
I would then take the information I get from the Google search (if the Google search didn’t turn up an obituary, of course) and incorporation certificate and run a background check, through the court system (most states have some sort of public state court/case search), VineLink (a prison database!) and using a private pay but legit service like intellius. Alternatively, if I’m looking to verify just the death—not the circumstances etc—I would go to vitalChek, and request a death certificate with the persons full name and DOB, using all the info I’ve gathered from the above searches.
