yo I know like ‘tis the season for all the “what about law school for me?” questions to start flowing in and shit  because hey admissions letters are being mailed out right now

but for real all you ppl asking me about “what is law school really like” like I mean I hate to burst your bubbles and shit but it’s not grandiose at all.

like I know all us law students have a fucking superiority complex and shit but honestly like if you asked me to sum up what I’ve learned in two years of law school it’s this:

1. International Multi-BIllion Dollar law suits can depend on the really urgent question of “What is Chicken” 
2. Always use the word “FUCK” if you’re protesting the draft because otherwise you’re being too literal and like those SCOTUS motherfuckers really love some figurative “many uses of the word “fuck’” protesting like I’m not even kidding it’s fucking case law 
3. Don’t worry about getting sued if you were a dumbass and decided to bring some live fireworks on a train and the resulting explosion caused some big ass statue of scales to fall on some old lady who was walking by because like that shit is hilarious and everybody knows it’s not really your fault and you don’t have money anyways so whatever people don’t care about suing you
4. Scalia is a dick and nobody likes him and even Clarence Thomas probably hates him right now because EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME YOU GOTTA WRITE A LONG-ASS DISSENT, SCALIA, WTF. 
5. Cardozo is to law school what Beyonce is to tumblr ok let’s just leave it at that
6. NOBODY ACTUALLY KNOWS WHAT THE LAW MEANS OR IS IT’S ALL UP TO INTERPRETATION AND LOOKING RIGHT SMART BUT FOR FUTURE REFERENCE JUST DO YOUR RESEARCH AND DON’T BE A DRUNK DICK TO THE JUDGE (start like 7 minutes in)

so like once upon a time there was this dude named Cohen who wore this jacket that said “Fuck the draft” to court during the Vietnam War and like the police were totes republican hardcore assfucks and they were like “Fuck you, we’re gonna arrest you” and shit and they did under some weird law in california that was basically like “you can’t disturb the quiet of any neighborhood or person” which was REALLY supposed to stop like riots and violence. Or something.

But anyways like apparently the test is inciting likely illegal activity (meaning like inciting people to draft dodge and shit) Cohen would have been even more screwed if his jacket said something grammatical and proper and non-slangy like “resist the draft” because that’s super literal

But like the Court was all like, “dude, “fuck” is metaphorical, like, what does “fuck” mean in this context, like we are not saying “fornicate with the draft” in this case right” (because you have to remember that the Supreme Court is made up of old white ppl at this point, plus Thurgood Marshall, who was probs snickering behind his hand or napping) so basically the state was like “dude, it’s the word “Fuck” it’s obscene” but the court was like “that’s a stupid argument, we can’t just start banning arbitrary words as obscene like wtf the STATE CAN’T DICTATE VOCABULARY”

So basically 

When in doubt over the nature of your political protest

USE THE WORD FUCK AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

AND DON’T LET ANY MOTHERFUCKERS TELL YOU OTHERWISE

…really, how did you GET THERE?

I could have SWORN I CLICKED THE PICTURE FOLDER.

Answer: My .gifs were protesting their rights as individuals and freedom of speech.